How to shape an Indian woman's identity from the time she is born?

(Addressed to parents, teachers and elders who have had a hand in raising children)

When I was 4, you asked me to be brisk, to run and play.
When I turned 13, you said I was too old to run around like a kid.
When I was 12, you said cosmetics were evil and to embrace simplicity.
When I turned 18, you asked me to deck up and not to act like a nun.
When I was 6, you tickled me time and again to hear my giggles.
When I turned 16, you yelled at me for laughing aloud and gaining unwanted attention.
When I was 8, you encouraged me to wear shorts for sports activities.
When I turned 14, you asked me to cover myself because I showed signs of womanhood.
When I was 10, you put me in the debate team at school.
When I turned 20, you ordered me to keep my opinions to myself.
Every stage of my life I followed your instructions, contrary though they maybe.
Now I am by myself in this world and I don't know what I am expected to do.
You wanted me to be strong as a kid but once I hit puberty you made me weak.
You dictated how I should behave because of this patriarchal society's expectation of it's women.
For wanting to please you and gain your approval at every stage of my life.
I am now lost, filled with self doubt and experiencing identity crisis.
Give your children the opportunity to find their strengths and weaknesses.
Embrace their individuality and accept them for who they are.
Guide them but don't stand in their way.